Its been a couple days since "that" and I feel like CRAP. I can't stop thinking about him and seeing the expression on his face and the tears welling up in his eyes when I told him it was over. And feeling the same thing happen to me when he did the same to me. My heart just keeps aching every time I tell myself to forget him and that this relationship was nothing but just a game, or that was what I thought.
I've never been the type to believe in love. What is love you might ask? Love is nothing but a bunch of bullshit that's been made up to make people feel better about themselves and also a crappy excuse for companionship. Its also not to mention a facade for many just to get in each others pants aka SEX. I've seen too many relationships just revolving around SEX and MONEY. How many relationships out there are actually based on pure love and sacrifice? NONE. That's why I've chosen to take relationships lightly and love loosely. It's never been a real problem for me to break a relationship as fast as i picked it up. The people I was with had the same mentality as me and understood what I needed and did not want. We each offered and traded certain goods and services; it was a simple transaction between two people.
Silly me though to think that maybe a "change" would be a good idea this time. Little did I know that I was about to fall right into something I completely despised and loathed. His name was Caleb and he was your average sweet guy with a heavenly smile that could melt the hearts of thousands of girls in the room. Did he melt mine you ask? Yea, maybe a little... Scratch that, he melted my heart big time then broke it then put it back together and broke it AGAIN. This poor girl got beat in her own game. SMH.
How did it start... Well, lets just say I had my eye on him at the same time my ex-best friend did too. There was no way I'd let her win him over and claim him before I did! It didn't take much before he was down on his knees for me and the face on my ex-best friend when she realized she lost was just priceless! Soon, after dating for a couple weeks I began to realize he really was the opposite of every boyfriend I had. He required a lot more attention and thought than I would ever spend on a single person of the opposite sex, but I bared with it for awhile. He didn't seem to realize that to me he was only a play toy and when it got to the point where we were through, he had still not realized. He kept asking me "why", "why", "why" and to be honest I didn't know why. It just felt like it was about time to just end it. This relationship lasted 4 months, the longest out of all my relationships surprisingly considering this was the most oddest one for me. I think it was the abnormalities of this relationship that kept me reeled in for this long, but like I said it was long enough.
That's the end of Part 1. The 2nd part will be published in 2 days. Thanks for reading.
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